A very brave woman, partner of a sex addict, emailed us to share this poem she wrote as part of her own therapeutic expressive writing. We hope other women in similar situations will benefit from this poem for two reasons.
First, if you feel alone in your suffering, we hope the emotion of this poem will help you understand that so many women like you are suffering–many in silence. Second, we hope this will give you courage to start your own expressive writing for healing. You don’t have to have talent with writing or poetry. Just writing your feelings and trying to make sense of what is happening to you. See this article on journaling as part of trauma recovery to help guide you as you write.
Betrayest Thou Me With a Kiss?
Like One of old, I have entrusted you
With my most prized possession.
I have trusted you to carry and protect
My heart. I have given you everything:
My thoughts, my feelings, my devotion,
My love, my body, my life.
I have withheld nothing.
But you have kept everything genuine
From me. You have repeatedly fixed
Your thoughts, your feelings, your devotion,
Your love, your body, your life to a lie.
For something less valuable than
Thirty pieces of silver, you have
Given everything; what you
Have dedicated your time and energy to
Cannot be held, nor traded; this façade that
You chase can never be caught.
You have nothing to show.
Your hands are as empty as the covenants
You made with me kneeling across an altar.
Your empty hands grasped mine.
Your tainted eyes gazed into
Mine and only saw the kiss and night
That was inevitable. When you said yes,
Did you mean it? When you vowed your
Fidelity, did you understand all it
Entailed? You partook of my body and blood;
Was it done in vain? Thou hast said.
I have seen your conflicting actions.
By their fruits ye shall know them.
Betrayest thou me with a kiss?
Until the day comes when your
Lips and heart draw unto me,
I repose patiently in my tomb,
Longing for your love,
Waiting for our pledge
To be resurrected
And made
Perfect.